Fear of Failing? Accountability?

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Hello everyone, 

     Everyone may think the VSG surgery may be the "easy" way out of the obesity world, but it's absolutely not! Yes, it's a great tool to help with the process but trust me, it's about 40% of the success. You have to relearn how to cook as far as portioning and serving size. Your eyes see food and want to eat everything, but your stomach says otherwise. It's very difficult to sit there and look at food the same way again. 

    There are foods you were able to tolerate before and now absolutely not! I feel that I am a victim of self-sabotage. Once I see my weight dropping significantly I would go and eat something I'm not supposed to eat. I then suffer from the pain of my error! Eating carbs hurts my stomach horribly, but then the psychological attack I do to myself is far worse! I blame myself and wonder why I allowed myself to "cheat" on myself and my well-being. Yes, we all make mistakes, but not one that I took a massive measure to fix. 

    I guess this blog is all about self-reflection and accountability for the mistake I made today, and I hope to get back on track again tomorrow. I can only take one day at a time and refrain from dropping the ball. I'm only hurting myself and my long-term success. 

Thank you for reading this blog, and I hope it has helped in some way!

My current stats:
  • Starting Weight (SW): 308.2
  • Surgery Weight: 284
  • Current Weight (CW): 182.5
  • Total Weight Loss So Far: 125.7

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